Rolling with the fear.

So, here I am again: afraid. A fear that I didn't even know existed came to life last night within me. I choose not to address specifics, but would rather focus on the fear. Fear has been a big part of my life ever since I was a kid. I think that's how most people are--whether they realize it or not. Fear is what rules the world.
Lately, though, I've been trying to face my fears to the best of my ability. Why? Because I'm sick of living in fear and being unhappy. I'm sick of being pissed at everything around me because I feel controlled by it all. I'm sick of being controlled by fear.
The fear I'm dealing with right now twists my stomach and brings the acid up my throat, giving me bad dreams and obsessive behavior. I say that this is me, but is it really is me? I am a person who's been molded to society, fit around other people's reflections of me. I am who I think I may be. This doesn't scare me, though. I've learned to be as raw with my personality as I can. You never know, maybe a gust of fresh air will come about and I'll find a new piece that was missing before.
I'll gladly face this fear. Is that weird to say? With my wide eyes and clenched stomach, I will face this with a smile. And I will enjoy it. But I will still be scared. I'm not making much sense today, probably because there's so much going on in my head. Maybe I need to just sit and cry to 30 again. Crying will feel good.