Law Class Makes Me Think.

We discussed the poem A Ritual To Read To Each Other by William Stafford in class; and there was a general good interpretation of it. Nevertheless, I wanted to look deeper into it for myself and decide what it means for me because that’s really all that matters in the end, right?

If you don't know the kind of person I am
and I don't know the kind of person you are
a pattern that others made may prevail in the world
and following the wrong god home we may miss our star.

It is really important in this life that we try to understand each other and the train of thought that is followed by our actions. Often times, we don’t think that others could possibly think the same way as we do. I think that’s when we get annoyed at each other because the reaction is far too familiar or far too alien. Why would anyone think that way? How dare they have the same reaction as I would?

This is something we have to break out of in order to leave the pattern that others have followed in the past. This is what the third line means to me: if you don’t understand who the other person is, you’re just going to slip along on the same path as those in the past, which ends in nothing happening and everyone upset.

The fourth line had a completely different meaning than what we talked about in class. It had more of a gospel theme behind it. In the gospel, we believe that people have false idols that they follow in their lives when they get caught up in something that shouldn’t matter. This line made me think of that: we will all most likely follow our own false idols (gods) to the grave. Sometimes (a lot of the time), a false idol can involve being too involved in yourself. Being too self centered would also help you fall into the same pattern of those in the past.

For there is many a small betrayal in the mind,
a shrug that lets the fragile sequence break
sending with shouts the horrible errors of childhood
storming out to play through the broken dyke.

This stanza, to me, is talking about how we are as children. Many things children do are looked down on in society and viewed as inappropriate. At the same time, however, it feels very freeing to act as a child would act occasionally. These instances could be viewed as small betrayals or horrible errors because you’re busting out of the mould, rather than remaining in that oh-so-easy single file line.

Sometimes, you have to simply “storm out to play” and ignore what’s being said behind you because people can be so judgmental and uptight.

And as elephants parade holding each elephant's tail,
but if one wanders the circus won't find the park,
I call it cruel and maybe the root of all cruelty
to know what occurs but not recognize the fact.

I’ve found myself in situations like this quite a bit: I wake up one day and wonder how I got where I was in life at that moment. I was engaged at the beginning of the semester, and I thought it was the right thing to do because every Mormon girl wants marriage. About a month ago, I woke up and realized that I was with the wrong person. Instead of continuing to hold to the elephant’s tail in front of me, I let go and went in a different, mysterious direction. Sometimes, that’s just how life has to go—let go of the comfortable and grasp some discomfort, but new. And sometimes it is viewed as cruel and emotionless. But when you know what you’re doing, there’s no need to cry about anything. I didn’t shed a single tear in my break up, even though he was my best friend.

And so I appeal to a voice, to something shadowy,
a remote important region in all who talk:
though we could fool each other, we should consider--
lest the parade of our mutual life get lost in the dark.

I think this stanza is talking about when we talk every day about everything and nothing all at once. We don’t remember conversations a lot of the time because it’s just us wasting our breath and time. We talk about how school was and how work was and how much we hate our bosses and how much we want to avoid homework and how tired we are; but nothing ever gets said. Think of how exhausting it would be to have every conversation ever had be completely meaningful and notable. Thus, we have to have small talk to relieve our heads after our long days.

At the same time, though, we can’t always have meaningless conversation. We have to get to know each other from time to time in order to keep our sanity and friendships. We have to understand each other for when crunch time arrives, and we need the support that can only come from those who know us under the surface. 

For it is important that awake people be awake,
or a breaking line may discourage them back to sleep;
the signals we give--yes or no, or maybe--
should be clear: the darkness around us is deep.

“For it is important that awake people be awake” is a very powerful statement in my mind. It really is important that we have open eyes and live our lives for every moment. It may be exhausting, but at least you’re living. Back to my sappy, sad story: I felt like my eyes were closed before I broke up with my fiancé. I had many moments in which I felt like there was something else I needed to be thinking; but it just wouldn’t come to my mind, as if it refused to make an appearance unless my eyes were open. Now that I’m single once more and alone, I’ve never felt so alive and vibrant. I’m happier than I have been for years—I’m happier with myself than I have been for years. I feel like my eyes are open and my mind is ready to accept anything that comes around.

This entire experience has been very tiring for me, though. Because of that, it’s caused me to look back and wonder if I could have just gone along with the original plan—or go back to sleep, as the second line implies. I obviously haven’t; but living every second of every day has significantly changed my life and made me so much more exhausted.

As for the last two lines, it’s very plain to me what they mean. It’s very easy to get confused in a world where communication is completely optional and completely vague. I’ve found that a lot of the fights I get into are about a miscommunication rather than something someone actually did (intentionally). Our words and signals need to be clear and obvious if we are to attempt living in a peaceful world. Otherwise, we will all be cast into the proverbial darkness and never be completely satisfied with any of our relationships.