When the rain is blowing in your face

Staring down that familiar

Empty, rose-colored pipe

Wondering how often you

Think about me

Wondering what

Just the thought of me does

Hoping this won’t be just

Another

Lust-driven

Blood stained

Hole in an already gaping heart

Knowing me

How I see you

Wondering when the idea

The image in my mind

Of your eyes, mouth, nose, hair, eyebrows,

Voice

Will begin to weaken

And I fall back into that

Single oblivion in which I seem

To belong

Wondering when the explosion

Fades and the embers have

Fallen, will you still be there

With your calloused knees and

Hands outstretched

Waiting for the same thing

As I am?

The drip

The murmers

The stains, the shimmers

The depth of the maze

This dark maze of fear

Seeing things of nobody else's mind

Hearing things that echo

In no one else's drums

I rationalize with myself:

I can be afraid of the dark

That darkness will swallow me

Someday

Nobody will see me anymore

Because I belong in this darkness

This maze that has no end.